The scariest thing to me about the OBGYN's office isn't the needles in the arm or pricks to the finger or even the duckbill platypus thing that they stick you-know-where. I mean, those all suck, yeah, but they don't make me fill with dread the way I do when it's time to get on the scale. I know how lame it is for pregnant people to complain about weight gain and I don't mind any weight related to the baby. I lost 20 pounds last year in a relatively short amount of time on the 3-hour Diet so I know that I can lose any weight I gain. But because I'm already overweight I'm only supposed to gain 10-15 pounds during the pregnancy. (Note: My Doctor never said anything about this but I read it on the internet). It says in What To Expect that the baby and its home and belongings weigh 15 pounds. So how I am supposed to gain less than the baby? And putting a limit on things makes it seem scary. I don't know what will happen if I go over this amount but I was hoping not to find out. I wanted to be the perfect pregnant girl who only gained weight in her basketball-shaped belly. So prior to my Christmas vacation I was eating nothing but healthy food and playing active games on the Wii. And then the holidays came and...well, I was a bit terrified of that scale today.
But I didn't gain any weight. I weigh exactly the same as I did 4 weeks ago, right down to the ounce. At first I let out a squeal of delight (I totally didn't mean to - it just happened). And then I started to panic. Why didn't I gain weight? I was on vacation for 12 days! I had fast food twice, ate at lots of restaurants and hardly ever had my daily doses of fresh fruits and veggies! When we were in North Carolina I loaded up on boiled peanuts and hushpuppies with honey butter. Not to mention the Christmas cookies and Reese Trees and Hershey Kisses! How did I not gain weight? Is my baby still alive in there?
Luckily it didn't take long for the nurse to find the heartbeat - 153. Brian got excited because he knows about the old wives tale that says a heart rate higher than 140 is a girl. He wants a girl. The doctor measured my uterus with a measuring tape and said everything is at is should be. Then he signed my permission slip. I now have my doctor's permission to Babymoon in the Caribbean!!!!! My dad is taking us on a cruise for our Christmas present! How awesome, right? We leave for Florida in 3 days!
I started to feel a little insecure when I was trying on my summer clothes. My "bump" isn't really distinguishable yet as a baby bump and it kind of just looks like I'm fatter than usual. I've also put a little onto my hips. My pre-pregnancy summer clothes still fit me but they look different on me because I have a different shape now and I don't feel like this shape is very flattering at the moment. I'm also WHITE! Obviously a pregnant chick can't go to a tanning booth and I read that self-tanners can turn out the wrong color because my hormones are out of control. My hair is a dull shade of brown with a little gray since I can't dye it and my face has that blotchy pregnant skin and I'm just yucky. So I worried about my gross, fat, white, dull, blotchy self for like 10 minutes and then I realized I was acting like a Fertile Ho and I snapped out of my whine-fest. I'm going to be in the Caribbean for 6 days! Who cares what I look like? Sheesh!
Because this will be the last relaxing vacation I get to take in probably 18 or so years, I am determined to make the best of it. I looked at the weather and saw that it is supposed to rain while we're in Grand Cayman and I said, "Yay! That means the beach will be less crowded!" Seriously, I'm going to love every minute of it no matter how bland the food is or how unfunny the cruise director is - I promise. The only thing that will dampen my spirit is if the ship sinks or tips over or catches on fire or gets shot at by pirates....ok i better stop before I freak myself (and my mom) out.
Things sure are different with a baby on the way, though. For my last cruise I bought all new outfits for both day and night including shoes and jewelry! This time Brian bought a tube of superglue to repair a few pairs of shoes with broken straps. Last time I cruised I paid $75 + tip for a pedicure in the ship's spa. This time I spent $2.99 on a bottle of Sally Hanson nail polish and let Brian paint my toenails. But I don't mind it one bit because I'm going to be a mommy!